Help! My wife's car is disgusting.

Kinja'd!!! "CalzoneGolem" (calzonegolem)
04/04/2017 at 11:39 • Filed to: None

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Opened the hatch Sunday to put sweaty field hockey goalie gear in the car and was physically assaulted by the smell. I thought it was the goalie gear but it was not.

This weekend I plan to remove all the seats, steam clean the rug, and clean the seats while out.

What are Oppo’s pro tips to clean interiors?


DISCUSSION (47)


Kinja'd!!! Jarrett - [BRZ Boi] > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:43

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There’s probably rotting food hidden somewhere. Or old lotion, if MCM has taught us anything.


Kinja'd!!! benjrblant > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:43

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No photos of the smell? What is this?!


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:44

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A bowl of coffee grounds is a good way to absorb nasty smells. Took the “smoked in” smell right out of a truck I used to have.


Kinja'd!!! TheRevanchist > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:46

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In the mean time, sprinkle some baking soda in all the areas you plan to vacuum. It will help neutralize some of the smell so it’s tolerable while you wait for the weekend.


Kinja'd!!! facw > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:47

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I have no tips, but here is Jolie Kerr’s column on cleaning up nasty sweaty ice hockey gear, some of which may be applicable:

http://deadspin.com/your-hockey-gear-is-foul-clean-it-or-else-1464457604


Kinja'd!!! Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > benjrblant
04/04/2017 at 11:47

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clickbait


Kinja'd!!! Azrek > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:47

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Vinegar.

There are recipes for vinegar and other materials that are safe on carpet.


Kinja'd!!! smobgirl > Jcarr
04/04/2017 at 11:47

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I have those baking soda air freshener boxes but coffee is a good idea too. My dog STINKS sometimes and it lingers in the car.


Kinja'd!!! crowmolly > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:48

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That’s very thorough, but I’d also spray everything down with a deodorizer. The headliner can absorb a smell, as can sound deadener. Then throw one of the “Scent Neutralizer” cans from Home Depot in the rear footwell.

I accidentally left a protein shaker in my trunk for 2 weeks while I was on a business trip and the stench was unbearable. Had to drive with the windows open for a few days even after I pulled up all the carpet.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Jcarr
04/04/2017 at 11:48

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I’ll have to give this a shot. Maybe I’ll toss a box of arm and hammer in there until the weekend


Kinja'd!!! Ash78, voting early and often > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:48

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MAD LIBBED IT FOR YOU

Opened the _____ Sunday to put sweaty _____ gear in the ___ and was physically assaulted by the smell. I thought it was the ____ but it was not.

This weekend I plan to remove all the ____, steam clean the ___, and ___ the ___ while out.

What are Oppo ’ s pro tips to clean _____?


Kinja'd!!! yitznewton > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:50

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My S2000's trunk was funky from a leak; when you have the stuff out, check around for dampness. Not sure what car you’ve got, but apparently Hondas are known for this. I Bissell’d my carpets, and then Arm & Hammered and Febreezed them when dry. It wasn’t perfect but I don’t notice a smell anymore unless I put my nose up against it.

We inherited my grandmother’s car, which to the day we got rid of it still smelled of the wet dog she occasionally transported in it and which died 15 years earlier.


Kinja'd!!! Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:51

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Baking soda sprinkled on the dry carpet/seats then vacuumed out helps, too. Did wonders when I was reconditioning a flooded car years ago.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > benjrblant
04/04/2017 at 11:54

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I tried and it broke my camera.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Jarrett - [BRZ Boi]
04/04/2017 at 11:54

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Grot.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever
04/04/2017 at 11:56

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I’ll stock up on the baking soda.


Kinja'd!!! Textured Soy Protein > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:57

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Solution for the future: some kind of trunk/seatback protector like in my wife’s Impreza hatch:

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Or just get a Matrix/Vibe, both generations of which have plastic seatbacks.

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The fact that these are all hatchbacks probably doesn’t help while driving around with sweaty field hockey gear but at least the trunk won’t absorb the smell?


Kinja'd!!! Lumpy44, Proprietor Of Fine Gif > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:57

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Set a bowl of vinegar in there too, really helps suck out smells, just remember to get rid of it before you drive, and don’t mix it with the baking soda!!


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Ash78, voting early and often
04/04/2017 at 11:57

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I just put down fart for everything.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > TheRevanchist
04/04/2017 at 11:59

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In addition to the smell her car is filled with 8 tons of garbage. This may or may not be linked to the smell.


Kinja'd!!! My X-type is too a real Jaguar > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 11:59

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Kinja'd!!! WilliamsSW > Jarrett - [BRZ Boi]
04/04/2017 at 12:00

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Yeah - this. I once crushed a can of soup with the seat motor, and didn’t realize it for a few weeks. In the summer. It was hard to keep from vomiting when I got in the car, it was that bad.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Textured Soy Protein
04/04/2017 at 12:02

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The goalie gear is not the source of the smell despite being sweated into by a teenager. We drove around for 4 hours with it in the hatch of my Forester with no ill affects.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Lumpy44, Proprietor Of Fine Gif
04/04/2017 at 12:02

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But ... my volcano!


Kinja'd!!! Textured Soy Protein > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:08

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Reading comprehension > me


Kinja'd!!! TheRevanchist > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:14

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Hmmm.... I will assume she has kids. They are the ones responsible for all of the mess in my car.

Story time, quick style: Car gets detailed. All stains and everything are gone. Looks brand new! 1 day later - kids leave chocolate on back seat in hot summer sun. *grrrrrr* 2 days later - find a Now N Later stuck to/melted into back set. *gives up on having nice things*


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:15

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I say we take off and nuke the entire car from orbit.

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Kinja'd!!! TheRealBicycleBuck > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:17

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When the kids were little, my wife’s car always reeked of spoiled milk. This is the primary reason food and drinks were not allowed in my car.

To fix the problem, we traded it in for a new car.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > TheRevanchist
04/04/2017 at 12:20

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We have two children. We spend more time in my car. Every family outing is done in my car. She just doesn’t clean her car out ever.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
04/04/2017 at 12:21

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I’m looking for an option that doesn’t destroy our neighborhood and leaves the car operational.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > TheRealBicycleBuck
04/04/2017 at 12:24

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Funny thing is that we take my car on every family outing, we’ve always allowed food and drink in the cars, and my car doesn’t reek.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:28

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Ah, so the non-ionizing radiation, and the tenting and autoclaving with 800ppm ethylene oxide, then. I’d recommend phosgene if you weren’t wanting to drive it again.


Kinja'd!!! TheRealBicycleBuck > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:28

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Little kids + milk... It turns out that sippy-cups aren’t spill-proof.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:29

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Serious answer, after cleaning all surfaces with vinegar or other substances, set up an ozone generator - your local rental place may have them. Does a very good job, actually does deodorize and kill germs.


Kinja'd!!! Chariotoflove > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:34

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I would do what you plan, steam clean every upholstered surface and carpet. It got baby diarrhea out of mine.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > TheRealBicycleBuck
04/04/2017 at 12:38

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Yeah I’ve found a few sippy cups in my career that you could feel the tension of the expanding gasses from the rotting innards.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
04/04/2017 at 12:43

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Ozone generator? Why don’t we just point a bunch of them at the hole?

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Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:56

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Just don’t drive with the windows down while the bowl is in there.

Coffee grounds everywhere.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Jcarr
04/04/2017 at 12:57

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This sounds like personal experience.


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 12:57

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Maybe.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Jcarr
04/04/2017 at 12:59

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Did someone jump out and say, “You’re grounded!”


Kinja'd!!! Eric @ opposite-lock.com > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
04/04/2017 at 13:57

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But it’ll also make your plastics brittle and leather doesn’t like it. He’ll want to air it out real good afterward, because you don’t want to breath ozone.

I was going to recommend it, aside from the negative effects it has on all materials in the vehicle. My company works in the stuff and it does wonders for killing microbes that make smells like this.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Eric @ opposite-lock.com
04/04/2017 at 13:59

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Yeah, always a balance between doing enough to kill a problem and damaging things in the process. Going for a pretty minimal exposure, evaluating after a thirty-minute clearout, and going from there would be smart.


Kinja'd!!! Eric @ opposite-lock.com > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 14:22

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Because that’s not how ozone in the upper atmosphere works.

You’d also need to concentrate it. I don’t know how you’d to that. O2 molecules are broken into O atoms and when they recombine, some become O3. The percentage is small, but it’s a very strong oxidizer and you don’t need much.

It’s doing some amazing stuff. It’s been used in hospitals for decades for killing pathogens in operating rooms, but in recent years we’ve built ways to produced controlled low levels of it that kill pathogens that are not resistant to it (most are). It’s doing good stuff in food processing and food storage, resulting in greater safety.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Eric @ opposite-lock.com
04/04/2017 at 14:28

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Thanks for the serious answer it was informative, but I was joking I didn’t really believe that’d be a solution.

Also, if it really were that simple I’m sure it would have already been done.


Kinja'd!!! Captain of the Enterprise > CalzoneGolem
04/04/2017 at 15:56

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If it’s super bad maybe just get the interior professionally detailed. They know what’s up


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > Captain of the Enterprise
04/04/2017 at 16:00

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Probably the best idea but ima have a go at it meself first.